This year has been a good one, overall. We have been so blessed by the Lord and there is never any room for complaining.
With each passing year I find I learn so much but it is one of those things I don't fully realize until I look back. I thought I'd take some of the parts of my life and see how the Lord has worked in them this year.
1. My walk with the Lord.
Each year the Lord continually shows me new things to learn and I find that if I just keep looking to Him and taking my hands off of the controls then life is much easier. As I have said before, it doesn't mean life is easy that way. Sometimes it is SO hard for this control freak to loosen her grip on what SHE wants, but I can honestly say the Lord has worked hard on that one with me this past year. I have been taking a journey on leaning on Him for everything. Have I perfected that? By no means has that happened, but I'm better than I was last year at this time. The growing part is what matters.
2. My relationship with Steve.
We've had our ups and downs like any married couple. This year there have been struggles that I never thought we'd encounter. Hard times for us that I would compare to a butterfly breaking forth out of its chrysalis. I continued to learn one must go through those times of struggles and hardship to learn how to build on the love and trust for each other. I know I have said this before, but today I love Steve SO much more than I did the day we got married, but it isn't because every day was a bed of roses. In fact, that love has become stronger more so through the struggles we have shared. I thank the Lord for the man I have married and that we have come through another year even stronger than last year and blessed greatly by the Lord.
3. My role as a parent.
Wow... I just never realized how tough parenting became the older the kids are. I *knew* it was tougher, but when you walk in those shoes, you realize just how tough it is. Consistency and love are the biggest things as a parent and it is something I learn more and more every day. Then, you throw in different personalities and your desire to treat them both equally, consistently and fairly through love... well, it becomes a challenge some days.
I see how Mikayla is as strong-willed if not stronger-willed than I was at her age. We clash at times and I know it is only because she is so much like me. I am always praying that I will always show her what is expected in a loving way so that her strong-willed self will turn out to be a wonderful leader that is loving her Lord. She has a tender heart and wants to please, but that independent streak has to be channeled in the right direction.
Wesley continues to be a tenderhearted little guy that is reminding me a lot of his Daddy. He has his moments like any of us, but he is this little laid back guy that desires to please. He has had to continue to work hard on his focusing and following directions... in all areas, not just school related. We have seen him come far... but we know he still has far to go. I know the Lord will continue to give him what he needs to mature in those areas.
They both amaze us most days with what they know and can do. I am proud of and love them both and couldn't imagine my life without them.
4. The love of material things.
The Lord has continued to teach me this year that I may not always get what I want, but I have all I need. My house may look like a disaster a lot of days... mostly during the school year... and I may not have everything "perfect" but it is ours and I am thankful. We have so much more than other people in this world and I should be content. I truly am content with what I have. I do still want... and sometimes do get things.. but the wanting becomes less and less. Things do not make me happy... my joy comes from the Lord. I had wanted to get my new camera recently.... that Canon 40D. Well, the money I was going to save needed to be used for some updates to the house. Honestly, I was OK with that and I can remember a time I would have been quite upset. I know I'll get it one day... but it will be in the Lord's timing and not in mine.
Contentment.... there is true joy in that.
5. New Years Resolutions are not for me.
I used to make New Years Resolutions but they usually lasted for a week. lol The Lord has also taught me that I just need to take each day, each hour, each minute and do my best for Him. I can do nothing without Him, so why make all of these silly thoughts that usually don't happen? I am choosing to desire for 2009 as I have seen happen in 2008... a growing in my love for the Lord, my husband, my children, my family and friends. A continual learning of who I am and what the Lord wants out of me is the best thing I know to do.
I am thankful for all of you that have "stuck with me" and read my blog all of these days of 2008. I will do my best to continue the every day saga of our lives in 2009. I look forward to a new year with the Lord and my family by my side. If I have that.. then 2009 will be a blessed one.
Happy New Year to you all....
1 comment:
Kellie, Great photo to go with your reflections on 2008! I loved reading what you wrote, it's so thoughtful. Happy New Year!!! :)
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