Quarantine - Feelings In This New Normal

I decided to document some things I have been feeling as we have walked through this "new normal" of our quarantine because of the COVID-19. It happened so quickly that I have found myself almost going through stages of not really knowing WHAT I was feeling. I think it is important that we document what is happening in our lives to have a record of how things are right now - right down to our emotions.

As I have previously stated in posts, I am an introvert so being quarantined is not a bad idea in my mind and heart. I can be fine just hanging out at home. What I did not realize was how I would feel when we are being told you have to really STAY HOME. I kind of feel like this calf in the picture below: "HEY....what's happening outside of my pen?"

Some of the "new normal" in my life right now is not very different from regular normal.

I am still reading God's Word daily.

I am still doing laundry and dishes. 

I am still trying to keep my house clean.

I am still enjoying my reading of books and other leisure activities.

I am still trying to exercise in some way daily.

I am still teaching.

What I did not expect out of this "new normal" in my life right now is:

I feel distracted when trying to focus on the Lord and His Truths.....which has made me feel very frustrated!

I feel so emotional over not seeing my students.

I feel we have lost a lot of closure for the school year.

I feel grief over memories lost.

I feel anxious over the unknowns.

I feel anger - and a lot of times I am not sure why!

I feel unsettled in my spirit because nothing is as it was just two weeks ago and we do not know how long this will last.

I feel overwhelmed with all I hear in the news and what people post on social media (including anger and conspiracy theories...).

However, feelings are just that - FEELINGS.

We cannot trust them.

Feelings will lead you astray faster than a wayward sheep.

That is why the word HOPE has continued to resonate with me every new day in this quarantine. I am so grateful the Lord gave me that word for my 2020 year. 

I may have all of those feelings I listed, but, more importantly, I have HOPE in the One Who is control of it all. That is why I can rest in Him - and not in these circumstances.

I have been clinging to different parts of Scripture - in particular, Psalm 16 and Psalm 33.

Psalm 16:5-8 has been a passage I have read often these last few days:

The Lord is my chosen portion and my cup; you hold my lot. 

The lines have fallen for me in pleasant places; indeed, I have a beautiful inheritance.

I bless the Lord who gives me counsel; in the night also my heart instructs me.

I have set the Lord always before me; because he is at my right hand, I shall not be shaken.

The verse the Lord gave me to reflect upon in 2020 for the word HOPE is Psalm 33:22:

"Let your steadfast love, O Lord, be upon us, even as we hope in you."

Steadfast = Faithful

Because the Lord is our HOPE, He is faithful to be with us through all of this uncertainty. He is faithful to take care of us during this time that has become so strange to us.

But it was never strange to the Lord.

He knew all along what this world needed at this time for 2020.

HE. KNEW. 

So while we are wrestling with a lot of feelings that are happening in our lives right now, cling to the fact that HOPE is here and now - and it is through Jesus Christ.

As I thought on this post, I just love how the Lord pointed me to this last portion of Scripture I am sharing . I am thankful for His loving direction - even when it seems dark and full of uncertainties. Trust His Word - NOT your feelings.

Romans 5:1-5

Therefore, since we have been justified by faith, we have peace with God through our Lord Jesus Christ. 

Through him we have also obtained access by faith into this grace in which we stand, and we rejoice in hope of the glory of God. 

Not only that, but we rejoice in our sufferings, knowing that suffering produces endurance, 

and endurance produces character, and character produces hope, 

and hope does not put us to shame, because God's love has been poured into our hearts through the Holy Spirit who has been given to us.

Be Still With Social Distancing

 With our news being filled with COVID-19 and learning precautionary steps we are to now take to help with the spread of this new virus, social distancing has stood out to me. These birds look like what I felt when I first heard it - the one on the right is me. HUH? You want me to distance myself from others?

Some people may see social distancing as a rewarding experience as they are introverted and love time to themselves. 

Others may feel as if they are now on a deserted bridge with bareness all around them and emptiness invades their souls.

Instead of seeing social distancing as something to endure, why not view it from the standpoint that we have the chance to BE STILL.

Our culture is so fast-paced today. I feel it daily and I am not involved in all of the things I see on social media sights. People are ALWAYS on the go.

I know we have had times in the winter of snow/ice here in the south that stops us from a lot of normal activity, but even then we are able to get together with neighbors/friends and play in the snow or just be together. 

This social distancing is a new thing for our ears to hear. At the sound of it, many have had anxiety rise up in them because of the unknown.  While we are still able to get out and about, we have to think differently about coming in contact with people right now. 

And all of this has happened fast.

Being an introvert, I have welcomed this newly expected slower pace. I have been excited to not have to go anywhere in a hurry and take time to be slower.  

I can understand there are those who are not feeling the same.

As I have sat and reflected on it all, I was struck by this thought:

I never have to worry about being "socially distant" from the Lord. He is always near me. 

I may choose in my busyness or distractions of life to find myself distant from Him, but He will never leave my side and always desires close contact with me.

This social distancing from other people will give me the opportunity to spend a closer time with the Lord. It will give me those moments for which I have been yearning in all my busyness. I am comforted by the fact that He is as close as ever and I can actually become stronger by being in His presence than by distancing myself from Him.

This year, the Lord gave me the word "Hope" as my word for the year. I was not sure where that came from exactly, as I had other words that I kept pondering. However, in recent weeks, the Lord has already shown me that this was the word I needed. 

Because of what the Lord showed me for this year, I have on my mantle, and sing often in my head, the song "In Christ Alone." Here are the words for the first stanza and I think it is so fitting for where we are right now in our world. 

In Christ alone my hope is found

He is my light, my strength, my song

This Cornerstone, this solid ground

Firm through the fiercest drought and storm

What heights of love, what depths of peace

When fears are stilled, when strivings cease

My Comforter, my All in All

Here in the love of Christ I stand

See this social distancing as a reminder that our Lord is ever near. We are the ones who distance ourselves from HIM. Choose this time to get back into closer contact with the One in which our HOPE is found. Just BE STILL with social distancing.