For our now almost 18 year old young man, farming is still top priority, and the love for it has stayed steady and grown through the years.
There has just been one problem.
One major problem we have dealt with for years.
He hates school. He has done poorly in school. College was looking bleak.
We realize that farming does not require the same amount of schooling that a doctor or lawyer needs, but there is still an important aspect to education for farming.
For years we have worked with him. We have tried to help him stay organized, keep him focused, give him study skills, etc... He has struggled since his first year of Kindergarten. He got a little better when we tried some medication to help him focus, but nothing has seemed to work since the 6th grade - and he is now in 11th grade. The road to his future was not looking hopeful.
For years we have prayed. For years we have worked with him. For years we have asked the Lord to help him get better.
For years.
Years of feeling that the definition of insanity (wanting a different result but nothing changing) was our life with him. Years of seeing our son see himself as, well, stupid.
After meeting with teachers and administrators at school we determined we would get him tested to see what we can do to help him. He has always thought deeply, yet his attention would never let him stay on task. We knew if we were to get him tested that would allow him to have interventions to help him where he is.
I began the process. I printed off the 5,000 page (felt like it... it was probably just 20) packet that I needed to fill out to get him tested through the public system.
I struggled with this. I struggled that I had not "helped" him with this years before. I struggled with the fact it was SO much to fill out in the paperwork. I struggled with the fact that it may not even work. I struggled with the knowledge I learned that certain interventions had to already be in place for an extended time before the public system would even think to begin the testing process.
I struggled with the timing of it all.
I never really filled out all of the paperwork.
School began again in the fall. I felt like there was no hope - we would just have to push through and he would have to study harder. He would have to put more effort into school. He was just going to have to do it!
I accepted that school was not his thing. I tried to cheer him on - only to have him come home and say that he was struggling yet again even though he was studying. We were at our wits end - we had no idea what to do.
Then came October - and the Lord used an event in my own life as the beginning of a Journey of Hope. Through "chance", some might say, I was able to earn a free testing/consultation with a brain training company in our area. What is so coincidental is that this was the same company I had written on a sticky note some years ago when he was struggling. I was going to check them out - but money was the only obstacle. The testing was not through a public system so we would have to pay for it out of pocket. Now, because of this surprise, I could schedule the testing. I was just glad he would now have something to help his teachers give him more time to think in class and understand his focus issues.
We had him tested in late December. We were able to get the results at the very beginning of January.
What we learned blew us away.
Our son was not being "lazy" all of those years. It was not just a case of Attention Deficit Disorder. He was struggling - big time. Our son was especially thankful for the testing - because he said now he was not crazy - or stupid - there really was a reason he had struggled for so long.
We knew the Lord had opened this door for him to be tested - now what? We began to pray and ask the Lord what He would have us to do to help our son.
As we began to pray, the Lord began FLINGING open doors for him to begin his training. The Lord made it clear to me that I would have to be a part of this training process - meaning, I would be spending four hours each week training him at home, while he also had three hours a week with his trainer. This would last for nine months. This was certainly going to be a journey.
I cannot adequately express just how many ways the Lord directed our steps with this process for him. I look back now and am blown away by how He moved and worked in a seemingly quick time. However, we have been praying for his needs for years!
In God's timing, not ours, the needs of our son were being met.
Now I look to this journey - this "Journey of Hope for the Future" - and my son now actually sees HOPE.
This journey will not have its hardships - there is a lot of time that will be spent helping him. It will be hard. I almost have the feeling you get in college when you look at the syllabus for a semester and get that knot in your stomach because you do not know how you are going to do everything. I have been trying to wrap my mind around the fact that life for the next nine months will be totally different than any other. It is going to be challenging in so many ways. I have found myself wanting to rush through it just to get to the end. I want it "over already."
But then the Lord began to bring this to my mind and heart:
The first nine months I carried him, along with his twin sister, was a new journey - and one I did not know how I was going to handle. There were challenges along the way that I did not know how I was going to get through. There were times I wanted it "over already" but I had to wait. The Lord was there with me each step of the journey, just like He is now. The Lord has put this journey before us to enable our son to have a HOPE and a FUTURE.
I just have to WAIT - and see what the Lord is going to do through this journey. Meanwhile, I get to watch His plan unfold with a front row seat. How awesome is that?
These are some verses the Lord has given to me in the last couple of weeks. I have clung to them as I have been trying to figure out how I am going to get everything done. I can trust that my Heavenly Father will walk with me every step of the way.
Isaiah 64:4
For from days of old they have not heard or perceived by ear,
Nor has the eye seen a God besides You,
Who acts in behalf of the one who waits for Him.
Jeremiah 29:11
For I know the thoughts that I think toward you, says the Lord, thoughts of peace and not of evil, to give you a future and a hope.
Ephesians 3:20-21a
Now to Him who is able to do exceedingly abundantly above all that we ask or think, according to the power that works in us,
to Him be glory
This Journey of Hope was not chance. This journey was hand-directed by our Heavenly Father who knew the needs of our son when he was still in my womb 18 years ago. In HIS timing, all of the plans He has for him are coming together.
To God be the glory - great things He has done - and will continue to do.
He is to be praised.
2 comments:
Kelly, I had no idea you were going thru this! Be encouraged: you are telling Corey’s story here. But he has gone as high as an enlisted man can go, has performed amazing physical feats in his wok, but has also conquered mental/learning situations that are unreal! And over the last 7 months he has drawn closer to God than ever in his life, through a devastating situation: infidelity by his wife & now divorce. But we can see how he has grown as a man in many ways & the tender heart he has always had is even more so now. Thank you for sharing!
wow, what you thought may have been the end of the story has turned out to be a glorious new beginning! praise God!!
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